Monday, 4 January 2010

Epic Fail Kelloggs

A while ago, I asked my long suffering lady friend Louise to come up with an idea for a breakfast cereal. It was actually one of the most serious conversations we had, and she came out with a great idea, including an idea for the design of the box and what the advert would entail.

I was suprised with how easy she came up with the idea, and thought that the breakfast cereal industry would be hard pressed to find someone with better ideas than her.

However, she has been trumped, by a guy working at Kelloggs who is thinking so outside the box that he's living in an underwater apartment on Pluto... I know that makes no sense to me either.

Pitcure if you will, a board meeting in early January. Mr. Kelloggs sits at the head of the table, looking at the sales figures for his various cereals for the previous year. He spots a problem, one of their products sells well all year round, but dips in december... he asks his idea men what they can come up with.

After months of research and development the top idea guy comes back to Mr. K and tells him that the best way to increase sales in decemeber is to incourage people to put HOT milk in their coco puffs.

What... the... F**K?

I jest you not, they spent millions on advertising that you put hot milk in coco puffs. What is the world coming to? Next they'll be telling you to try eating un-cooked chicken and to shake hands with french people!

I refuse to do any of the above!!

Never trust Kelloggs... their cornflake advert is voiced by the villain from lethal weapon 2, and that guy was a racist even if he did have diplomatic immunity!

New Year, Same Ol' Shit

Well it's 2010, and we're two years away from the end of times according to the Mayan Calendar, which if I'm honest is the worst calendar ever as their picture for January this year was a Llama. Thanks.

Last year there were certain big developments in my meaningless exsistence, one being that I got married but more importantly I managed to film a few shorts and started/completed the zombie survival story arc!

I spent new years in London which was a nightmare thanks to the thousands and thousands of people that had the same idea as myself and my long suffering lady wife Louise. It was fun, but I wouldn't mind if we didn't do it for another 26 years.

So what have I got to look forward to this year? Well, I'm hoping on getting my zombie survival story compiled and maybe published, the Endless Setlist series will be completed and shown on "The Gamer Scene" and there's a chance that I will be travelling Europe for a month, but this time not in disguise!

My new years resolution was to eat healthier, and so far, I'm doing ok. Instead of my usual bowel-cancer inducing sugar fest, I just had a sandwich, a packet of crisps and a spring water drink, although the last one nearly poked my eye out when it uncoiled.

What will be going on in my blog this year? Well, if I do travel, you will be finding out firsthand via my iphone (god bless it) what antics I'm up to. Plus I'll be doing some more film "aftermaths", some reviews and maybe another story arc.

Well, I'd better get back to pretending to do whatever it is I do for a living. Ciao for niao! :D