Today I decided to have a microwaveable meal from Tesco's. After walking past the cake Isle and "accidently" knocking over and destroying there Mince Pies, I arrived at the "Ready meal" section and picked up something "tasty" for my lunch. (mental note, don't use as many "quote" marks in a "sentence" again)
However, as I put it in the microwave I noticed a button on the front of the microwave. The Button read "STOP TIME".
I had no idea that microwaves were that sophisticated that they could stop time itself!!
Fearful of what the overlord who I work for would do with our time stopping device I did the only logical thing, I destroyed the microwave with my bear hands, yes I said Bear not Bare.
After successfully defending my home from Bear Attacks last weekend, I made a pare of gauntlets from the carcass's and used them to smash the powerful time stopping device.
I then buried the remains of the microwave in seperate locations, so that's what I've been doing today, and they say my job is dull!!!
Showing posts with label Mince Pies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mince Pies. Show all posts
Friday, 12 September 2008
Thursday, 11 September 2008
Xmas come early?
Santa comes but once a year (I think Mrs Claus is a frigid bitch) and last time I checked that time tied in with Jesus's birthday, the 25th of December.
So why oh why does Tesco's deem it appropriate to sell Mince Pies in September? Mince Pies are christmas treats, not all year treats. If you could get them all year they'd not be that special. But obviously Tescos is wanting to beat all it's other competitors (ASDA, Morrisons, Sainsbury's, Count Dracula) to the post by getting it's xmas stock out asap.
But this is what I don't get, they've got Mince Pies in for xmas, but nothing for Halloween. Have they forgotten the overly commercialised poorly celebrated tradition that is Halloween? Or do they view Xmas as the next BIG event?
To answer, yet another of my questions, I spoke to Tracey Gorbochov, a tesco's employee about this. Tracey grunted twice which meant she understood the question, and scratched the floor, signalling that it was a poorly planned marketing decision.
It's a good job I speak Tesconian!
So why oh why does Tesco's deem it appropriate to sell Mince Pies in September? Mince Pies are christmas treats, not all year treats. If you could get them all year they'd not be that special. But obviously Tescos is wanting to beat all it's other competitors (ASDA, Morrisons, Sainsbury's, Count Dracula) to the post by getting it's xmas stock out asap.
But this is what I don't get, they've got Mince Pies in for xmas, but nothing for Halloween. Have they forgotten the overly commercialised poorly celebrated tradition that is Halloween? Or do they view Xmas as the next BIG event?
To answer, yet another of my questions, I spoke to Tracey Gorbochov, a tesco's employee about this. Tracey grunted twice which meant she understood the question, and scratched the floor, signalling that it was a poorly planned marketing decision.
It's a good job I speak Tesconian!
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