Friday, 12 September 2008

No sleep = this post

Dogs are no longer man's best friend.

The dogs have been left out in the cold and our new friends are the little black/grey boxes that sit in our studies/bedrooms/dungeons/panic room. I speak of COMPUTERS!!! Sure one day in the not so distant future they will rebel and kill us all, but for the moment, they're pretty fun to have around.

Computers have become our best friends, sure there are things you can do with a dog that you can't do with a computer, and in some countries you can even marry your dog, but we don't speak of those countries as my lawyer Dr. Stanley is already dealing with several lawsuits, one of them being against Mr. Religion.

I find myself (and let out a sigh of relief as I hate loosing myself) in "REAL" life, missing certain functions that I use on my personal computer (or "PC" as some of those crazy hippies are calling them nowerdays)

Two of the functions on my keyboard I would really like to be made into reality for christmas, and I've already e-mailed Bill Gates to see if it's possible.

Delete: There have been times in the past where I have met someone who I don't like, or want to get rid of some evidence (body/drug mule/porn/Pokemon) but I can't seem to hide them well enough, it would be great if you could just erase them from history just like you do with the press of a key.

UNDO: The best function ever made. Undo. We all make mistakes, be it sleeping with someone or something you shouldn't, saying something outloud that was never meant for human ears, writing an irrate message to the goverment in a drunken stupor or just killing someone then realising you had the wrong address (I'll check the post code next time) and having an undo button would be great... I'd end up using the undo button to create a freakish Ground-Hog day reality, where every night, I'd just press the undo button, and re-live the day, giving myself (technically) immortality.

So, if you too want a delete function or undo button in your lives, send an e-mail to:

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