Monday, 29 September 2008

Store Wars : Aisle One - The Ketchup Menace

I was as suprised as the next person to find out that Forest Gump was a zombie, but I digress...

Last night whilst flicking through the 3 channels I have here in my "bat cave" I came upon an advert, an advert for Sainsbury's tomato ketchup.

From what I can remember from my drug enduced state the advert had a family round a dinner table with the lower class fare of chips I suppose. The dad wants some ketchup, grabs the sainsbury's one on the table and is unsure of it's authenticity, maybe he had a bad experience before with some store brand ketchup (where it was infact 1% tomato and 99% acid) and it all ended up with the deaths of his first family, so he decides not to go through the trauma again and doesn't want the ketchup.
Then sainsburys tell us that even though there product MAY contain high acidity levels, it's at least 20p cheaper than the leading brand (*cough* Heinz) and we're treated to the dad's kids now teasing the dad by not giving him the ketchup.
I'm sure after the camera stops the dad punches his son in the face, and the family prepare for another night of abuse from there alcoholic father.

I had to goto Tescos today for lunch, after being too scared to make myself a lunch today thanks to the ghost that now lives in my fridge, and on the way in I spied a sign stating that there ketchup was the cheapest.

So it seems the impeding financial crisis has made the supermarkets bring Ketchup into the fray, I had no idea that ketchup was such a competitive market, and how long will it be before Asda follows suit and brings out there free ketchup!?!?

I asked Connifer, a Sainsbury's employee to comment on the latest advert. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to understand the Sainsburyish, as I am only fluent in Teconian and Morrisan who communicate through Morris Dancing, not pretty. Luckily there was a translater on hand who translated the clicks and beeps that Connifer made. Apparantly Connifer didn't know anything about ketchup, but did tell me that one of the original Sainsbury's founders was fired as he used to ride his bike through the store.

Anyway, get back to whatever it is your aren't doing!

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