Thursday, 2 September 2010

The Great Rambling - Nemesis

Where would Sherlock Holmes be without Moriarty?

Where would Peter Pan be without Captain Hook?

Where would God be without the Devil?

All the cool people seem to have a nemesis, some form of person that is everything they oppose. I decided, as of five minutes ago, that I needed to get a nemesis.

I already kind of have a nemesis, who I shall codename Pearl. Pearl, is the dullest person on earth. If you were to look up the definition of dull, there would be just a phone number, which would put you through to her and one of her boring stories.

I have to listen to these stories day in and day out, and it's gotten to the point that I try to leave the room if she so much as opens her mouth, for fear she will bore me to death.

I decided, that enough is enough! I had to banish this she-harpy to hell before she drained all of the colour out of the world (a feat she is adept at) So I hired Ninja assassins.

This seemed like a good idea, because even if she wasn't killed, at least she'd have a story to tell me that didn't involve her boring life. However, the following day after the assassination attempt, I found that she was still alive and even she, could make a story about Ninja's un-interesting.

I however, do not count Pearl, as my true adversary, for she is too dull to be my true nemesis. So I have begun to search for someone who will stand against my plans. What my plans are, I don't quite know yet, but I feel if I had a nemesis that my plans would probably be more nefarious, so that's why I need one.

If you'd like to be my nemesis, please go ahead and drop me a line.

If not, I shall have to scour  the earth to find them... until then, I shall have to do with Pearl and her Dementor style soul-draining abilities.

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